Let me preface this story with the following: 1) We are attempting to garden sans pesticides. 2) I hate bugs, and moreover, I had the feeling of bugs crawling on me in any way shape or form. I especially am not a fan of anything in the “jumpy” family, which includes (but is not limited to) crickets, spider-crickets, spiders, and the like.
Now, I can tune out a lot of things and find ways to deal with the things I have a hard time tuning out. Like said jumpy bugs–I simply put on long pants and the gardening gloves and I can ignore the problem. Or the weeds we can’t seem to tame–seems like good garden camo to hide from said bugs and other garden loving thieves. And while I can become mildly irritated at the other “stuff” going on, I normally find what’s right in the situation rather than being mad about it. Thus why there are more positive posts than negative ones thus far.
So today, I’m minding my own business, and decide since we’ve had friends and family in town since Thursday, I should probably get out there and see what needs to be picked. Sounds good, right? Right! So here we go–tomatoes, a few cukes, some purple podded beans, and then I look at the corn. The forest of corn growing in the back forty and say, to myself, “Well, GAL, you have your long pants on…what’s the worst that can happen? ” I work my way back to the Magical Corn Forest, and start finding some yummy ears of corn–this is excellent! Until Jiminy Freakin’ Cricket soars through the air, whizzes by my ear and lands on the leaf sitting directly in front of my face.
I’m pretty sure he had the little top hat on, smiled and winked at me, did a little jig, and then thought twice about jumping on my forehead.
Which was the exact moment I said “F this noise,” and hauled my cake laden sorry ass out of the garden. Sorry, freakishly large Disney creature, in this life we cannot be friends.
So as I glare out at our garden from the safety of our kitchen window, all I can see now is everything that is not working in the garden. The weeds, the corn that should have been thinned out but wasn’t, the tomatoes that are really too close to each other, and not to mention the squash that has mysteriously just vanished from the garden.